Some time ago, my husband was looking into taking supplements and did a ton of research regarding the best brands and types of supplements to take. While it is true that it is best to get your nutrients from your diet, sometimes you may need a little extra help. This is particularly true for pregnant women who need to ensure that they are taking certain types of nutrients to support a healthy pregnancy. This article by the Mayo Clinic is informative and to the point. I have further summarized its key points below:

• Following a healthy diet is important, but you may still miss some important nutrients during pregnancy. A prenatal vitamin will ensure that you are getting everything you need.
• Some of the key nutrients that you may need to supplement include:
  • Folic acid to prevent neural tube defects.
  • Iron to support the baby’s growth and also to prevent anemia in the mother.
  • DHA to support the baby’s brain development.

It is ideal to start taking prenatal vitamins before conception so I started taking mine 1-2 months before we started trying. I had no trouble taking vitamins but it was a little difficult during the first trimester as sometimes the vitamins made the nausea even worse. So my tip is to take them before bedtime!

There are a lot of vitamins out there and I never really understood the importance of buying a high quality vitamin until Jerry forced me to switch brands. I initially bought a positively reviewed once-a-day prenatal vitamin, but Jerry told me that the quality may not be that high. While a “so so” brand gets the job done, it is way better to get a reliable, high quality brand that you are confident with. I did a little bit of research myself and found this helpful article. Some major points are:

• Supplements are part of a wild field that is mostly unregulated. You want to make sure you are purchasing vitamins from a reputable brand to ensure they are properly tested for safety and purity.
• Supplements that are cheaply made will usually contain forms of the vitamin that are not easily utilized or absorbed by the body. For example, folate is important for preventing neural tube defects, but most vitamins will not use natural folate and use folic acid instead, a form that is poorly converted by most people.
• High quality supplements will contain less toxins, including heavy metals. This is particularly true for supplements such as DHA, where it should be emphasized that the source is wild caught and that what you are buying is non-GMO verified.

By investing in extra testing and procedures to deliver the purest and most effective form of a vitamin, the price for higher quality supplements may be justifiably higher than for low quality supplements. Here are the two brands that I use:

Daily prenatal – Thorne Basic Prenatal: The folate is in the natural form instead of folic acid and B12 is in the natural absorbable form of methylcobalamin instead of cyanocobalamin. Thorne is a very reputable supplement brand and we have used it in the past for non-pregnancy related supplements also.

DHA – Nordic Naturals Prenatal DHA: The deep sea fish oil is wild caught and also tested by a third party certified lab for environmental toxins, ensuring its purity and freshness. This brand is also recommended by the American Pregnancy Association.

As always, this information is drawn from my own experience and research, please always consult your doctor or healthcare professional to make decisions that are best for you.

With the body quickly changing, one of the important things to get to make sure you are comfortable during your pregnancy are maternity clothes! I have come to realize that they don’t actually have to be specifically maternity apparel, many “normal” clothes are actually super comfy as well. This of course also depends on how your body changes in your specific pregnancy and your body shape, but I have listed below some of my favorites so far.

Sports bras: I basically live in sports bras regularly and only wear wire bras or nipple stickers for specific outfits. I was able to wear my regular sports bras for most of my first trimester but as my breasts grew bigger I knew I had to get some new sports bras! For reference I am usually a 32C or 34B.

• First to early second trimester: My pre-pregnancy favorites were the Lululemon Born to be Wild Bra (in size 4) and the Nike Pro Indy (in size S). Both are light support bras and I absolutely love them for working out. I was able to wear all of these for most of the first trimester. As the growth started, the Free to be Wild Bra was the first to go as it has the lowest coverage. The Nike Indy was still fitting nicely for a while but got a little restrictive soon. I also had a few Lululemon bras (also in size 4) that I think are called the Flow Y Bra Nulu, these were also more comfortable and I was able to wear them up to early second trimester.
• Second trimester onwards: I ordered the Lounge Bra from Alo Yoga and sized up to a Medium. The fabric was so soft and the bra shape was also very comfortable and non-restrictive. I don’t think this bra is supportive enough for anything other than daily use and low impact sports. I have also changed up my workout routine so these bras worked well for me. I am hoping that they will be ok for the third trimester as well but if not I will update this post 🙂 The photo below shoes the Free to be Wild Bra and the Alo Lounge Bra. 

Leggings: Another item that I live in… I wear a lot of Lululemon (size 4)  and Nike leggings (size XS). Sooner or later I realized that they were getting super tight and then I was having a hard time pulling them over my butt!

• First trimester: I mostly wore my regular leggings
• Second trimester: I ordered some maternity leggings from ASOS and they are high waisted plain black leggings. They are pretty comfortable but don’t offer a lot of support. I also ordered the High Waist Dash Leggings and the Airbrush Legging from Alo Yoga and sized up to a Medium. The Airbrush Legging is super stretchy and comfortable. The Dash Leggings have an annoying decal at the back of the calf that I find a little itchy but the high waisted aspect is nice as it gives the bump a little bit of support. I also ordered the Lululemon Align Leggings, which is supposedly the holy grail of maternity leggings. I got one in my regular size 4 and also one size up to 6 in case I need it for the third trimester. The regular size 4 fits really well for now (I am at 24 weeks) and the high waisted band also feels great on the bump! The material is also soooo soft. 

Dresses: I hate wearing jeans and always find dresses way more comfortable. I was able to wear a lot of my regular clothes such as loose maxi dresses and flowy dresses. A game changer is a T Shirt Dress. I got one from Cotton On and it is SO comfortable. I think I can wear it all the way to the end of my pregnancy. When buying maternity dresses, don’t buy wrap dresses because they usually don’t fit well (not for me at least) and also don’t get things in a restrictive fabric. After buying some things in the first round and seeing what works best, I opted for soft fabrics in flowy shapes with stretchy waistbands in the second order. 

All in all, I was able to get a lot of things that I can still wear even when I am not pregnant. I hope that these tips were helpful and that you find outfits that make you feel comfortable and happy! 

You want to make sure you get the best and safest items for your new baby but unfortunately it can be more difficult than you expect. There are SO many products out there and many are irresponsibly marketed as “safe” when they are not!

I came to this realization after months of research and it has really pissed me off. How can companies be so irresponsible… especially when it comes to the thing we want to protect the most. I was shocked to see the amount of products that companies shamelessly promote to parents that are developed without safety guidelines or scientific evidence regarding the safety for infant use. Coming from a health and research background, I have always been super anal about fact-checking and doing my due diligence. I hope that this post will be helpful for others but of course ALWAYS do your own research as this is just my own experience. I will do more detailed posts regarding specific items I will use for safe sleeping, car seats, etc, but these are some general tips for combing through the mess of baby products out there:

1. Make sure that the claims made by the company for a product are backed by scientifically sound evidence or medical expertise (specifically pediatricians). A lot of companies will promote items in an appealing way, but many of these items actually cause more harm than good. For example, sleep positioners claim to keep your baby in a specific position and reduce the risk of SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome), when in truth the American Academy of Pediatrics has always recommended AGAINST the use of sleep positioners and sleep positioners may actually increase the risk of suffocation. Read more about it on the FDA’s website here and on a pediatrician reviewed article here.
   

   An example of a sleep positioner and their appealing but unproven claims 

2. Always look up the specific product to check if it has been recalled. Once again, many companies come out with these fancy products claiming that it will solve this and that issue. Once you look it up, you may be shocked to find out that millions of this product have been recalled because it has been linked to numerous infant deaths. For example, inclined sleepers have been promoted as helping babies with indigestion and the ability to create a soothing and safe sleeping position. In truth, inclined sleepers have been linked to numerous SIDS deaths and the actual medically sound advice is for babies to sleep on a FLAT and firm surface. Read more about the recall of millions of inclined sleepers here.
3. Popularity is not everything/beware of pretty instagram posts. This calls back to the examples in the point above. Some of the inclined sleepers that were recalled were extremely popular products and this might make it seem “safe” to some people. I have also noticed that many instagrams post pretty sleeping pictures of babies surrounded by toys, blankets, and crib bumpers – all of which are risk factors for suffocation. These posts may look pretty, but are grossly irresponsible.
4. Know what you are looking for when you read reviews. Yes, reviews are super helpful and I love combing through them whether I am looking for a new restaurant to try or whether I am buying sheets for the nursery. However, make sure you pick out the relevant details. Even if some random woman in the UK thinks this product is amazing and her baby sleeps so well in it, it does not mean it is safe. Reviews are helpful for finding out other details such as quality, personal preference, ease of use, etc, but it is not sufficient for other things such as safety (unless they said the product exploded or had some other explicit safety issues).
5. Look for official safety requirements/standards. This may not apply for everything but for certain items such as car seats, you should always make sure that the product meets certain safety requirements (I will write a separate post regarding car seats).
6. Do a lot of research. This is a pretty general tip… but I could not stress this enough. I have had to look through so many different websites to make sure something was safe or unsafe. Things are not always clear and you should always check a few sources before making up your mind. Don’t just read one person’s review or hear from a friend that something is great and take their word for it. Ultimately it is your decision on what you want to do for your child and you want to make sure you researched the shit out of it and are able to make the best and most informed decision.

 

I was 30 when I found out I was pregnant and this meant that it was the period when most of my friends were getting married or getting ready to have kids. Weddings also mean… bachelorette trips! Two of my best friends were getting married and had super fun overseas bachelorettes planned. One was in mid November where I would only be at around 8/9 weeks and too early for us to be publicly open about the pregnancy. In the second trip, I was just at 12 weeks so everyone already knew. In the first trip, I had only told a very small number of my closest friends at this point. Even though I hardly go out to party anymore, bachelorette trips are the major opportunities to go hard once more with good friends. I was a little nervous about how I would be able to conceal this little secret, especially since I am always the first reach for that vodka soda.

I looked up a few tips online (the internet is awesome), but many of the tips were way too complicated… such as telling the bartender beforehand so that they can switch out your drink when you are there with your friends. I decided that I was going to tell people that I was either sick or not drinking because I was actively trying for a baby. I decided to go with the latter because sickness has never really stopped me from having a drink or two and it also seemed like too big of a lie to pretend to be sick the entire trip.

Here are some tips that I think may be helpful: 

When the pregnancy is still a secret

1. Think of an excuse that you feel comfortable with. If you think that pretending to be on antibiotics or having to make up an entire story of being ill is too much, it probably will be! I thought that my reason that I was actively trying made sense and it was also not too much work to maintain. 
2. Tell a select few. I was not ready to tell everyone about the pregnancy, but I did tell a small number of people on the trip. This made me feel a bit more comfortable because they knew what was going on and they could also keep an eye on me in case I was feeling unwell. You should also consider telling the bride-to-be because this is a trip in her honor so she would appreciate knowing what is happening (and why you are not going all out haha). But obviously this is all up to you! 
   • You may also want to reach out to the person who is planning special activities. For example, if someone is planning a cocktail making party of massage, you should let them know you are pregnant in advance so they can make special arrangements for you. 
3. Don’t worry too much about the secret. Even though you have an excuse ready and will try to keep it up, it is likely that some on the trip will guess that you are pregnant anyways (many have dealt with pregnant friends and have heard that excuse before!). Don’t sweat it too much as most people understand the delicate nature of this time and will be tactful even if they secretly have suspicions.
4. Remember that the safety of you and the baby is the #1 priority. During the trip, I was able to not drink but sometimes situations arise that are less than ideal. We went to this bar and it was extremely smokey. I was not sure if I should leave early at first because I felt like it was too “obvious”, but ultimately I did because me and my baby’s health is way more important that keeping up appearances. If people got suspicious and wanted to speculate, so be it. 

General tips

1. Rest up! Your body is working hard to create a human! This is not the time to rally and see if you can be the last person standing. If you are tired, just go and take a nap or sit back and relax. 
2. If traveling to a hot location, stay hydrated and stay in the shade: This is more of a general travel tip for pregnant people, but since many of our friends have trips in SE Asia locations, this is very important! You are much more prone to fainting and dizziness while pregnant (and high body temp) so you definitely want to be careful. I fainted briefly in Bangkok and it was quite a scary experience. 
3. Do extra research on dietary restrictions. This is another general travel tip, but when you are eating in a group and traveling to a new country, you should do a little more research on what foods are ok for pregnant people to eat. I was unable to eat any of the hairy crab roe while I was in Shanghai and I also had a few items substituted for my meals in Bangkok.
4. Pick and choose parts of the trip. No one wants to miss out on a bachelorette to celebrate your good friend getting married, but sometimes there might be parts of the trip that doesn’t make sense. It is ok to go to parts of it and skip other parts! For example, I went to a trip segment in Bangkok but skipped out on the festival Wonderfruit because I was worried about the heat and mosquitoes. Find ways to be involved that makes sense for you and your pregnancy 🙂
5. Don’t let the pregnancy make you feel boring/less fun! This obviously depends on how your pregnancy is going. While I was more tired than before, I was still able to go to the club with my friends and dance until 2 am. Don’t feel that just because you are pregnant and can’t drink, you are boring and can’t have tons of fun with your girls! 

I did not know too much about pregnancy symptoms except for the stereotypical “woman hugging the bathroom” in the morning scene in movies. I wasn’t sure if I was going to have bad morning sickness and also found out after some research that morning sickness often does not only occur in the morning, it can happen anytime of the day or last all day (awesome…)! I had already researched on some early pregnancy symptoms and soon found out for myself that these symptoms get slightly more severe as the first trimester progresses. The first trimester is a turbulent time because hormones are surging and the placenta is also developing. The body is adjusting to all these changes and this can result in some unpleasant symptoms. Here is a helpful infographic from Flo Health:

Luckily I did not experience severe morning sickness but I did some several bouts of nausea. It basically felt like a hangover all the time. I was also extremely fatigued and this was frustrating to me because I usually had so much energy and loved being active. Jerry would often come home from work and find me in bed because I just did not feel good. However, I was still grateful that I never actually threw up and things were overall manageable.

I was also getting heat flashes, especially after I ate. This was pretty uncomfortable, especially in the warm Hong Kong weather. I was also getting attacked by some serious hunger pangs. Once I was hungry, I HAD to have food or else I felt like I was going to die. After a few hangry attacks, we decided to keep snacks in my bag and also in the car to make sure we are always well equipped. It was crazy to think that this tiny thing was only the size of a poppy seed… yet my body was going a bit crazy! Jerry would sometimes tell me that I didn’t need that much food because the baby was the size of a seed, but he quickly learnt not to challenge me about my food intake.

With the increased appetite and also hormonal changes, my body was also changing. I definitely felt my favorite sports bras getting a bit tighter and it was no longer comfortable (or appropriate!) to wear them. In the first few weeks, my regular clothes were still fitting fine but it soon became a bit too tight as I neared the end of the first trimester.

Apart from the physical symptoms, the first trimester is a strange time because you are always a bit on edge, unsure of whether the pregnancy will go smoothly. We were so excited, but I was also always a bit unsure of whether things would go downhill and did not want to be TOO excited yet. Apart from the slight anxiety of a miscarriage, it was also such a blissful time and I did enjoy the private little joy that Jerry and I shared. It was our little secret. At around 6 weeks, our doctor told us that it was highly unlikely that I would have a miscarriage due to my age and health. It was a reassuring comment, but I was still excited for the first trimester to be over so that I could be even more certain.

The traditional advice is that you are supposed to wait until the 12th week to tell other people of the happy news. Obviously this is your own choice and I had told some close friends earlier than that. Jerry and I did decide to not tell people until around 7-8 weeks. There is no right or wrong way to do it but the understanding is that miscarriages are much more common during the first 12 weeks so it is better to let people know after that time frame. My feeling was that I only told people that I was also comfortable talking to if the worst were to happen. These were my best friends and I knew that if I were to have a miscarriage, they would also be the people I turned to. I was so happy to share the good news with my best friends while Jerry was a little more on the DL and wanted to share the news later.

Overall the first trimester was a time of excitement but also came along with some uncertainty and uncomfortable symptoms. It was still a bit bewildering to me that something was growing inside me!

We had made an appointment to meet our OB-GYN before getting pregnant so that we would get to know him better and to see if we were the right fit. He came highly recommend from our good friend who has 5 kids and his reviews online were also insanely good (one woman even said she might consider getting pregnant again just to have him as a doctor…what?). He seemed quite surprised to see us since we weren’t even pregnant and were perfectly healthy and had no specific questions. He was friendly and told us to go on another honeymoon and find him again when we were pregnant.

After my negative pregnancy test, I was still experiencing crazy mood swings and heat flashes. I noticed myself getting to the edge of tears and rage when we go to a restaurant and they had no seats… and was also getting a bit more fatigued. I decided to take another pregnancy test in a few days. I read online that it was important not to take TOO many pregnancy tests because it will really affect your mood and it can get obsessive. I decided to wait a few days and also bought another brand that had better reviews online. I used First Response for my first test, which claims to be able to detect a pregnancy earlier than other tests. However, online reviews were actually quite bad for this brand and many claimed that this test came back negative while other tests revealed that they were pregnant. I also read that early detection tests can sometimes detect a “chemical pregnancy”, a very early miscarriage that occurs before 5 weeks. Regardless of whether it was the brand’s problem or just that I tested too early, I decided to buy a Clear Blue pregnancy test and carried out the test again. After waiting patiently for a few minutes… the results were in!

Jerry was with me when we saw the result and the bathroom was instantly filled with laughs, cheers, and hugs. It felt a bit surreal because I kept looking at it and even though the instructions on the results were so clear, it still didn’t feel real. Was there was this tiny thing developing inside my body? Should I take another test to be sure? I spent the rest of the day looking at this test a few more times. Staring at these clear lines… as if I had misread them. I then made an appointment with my GP to get the blood test done. A few days later I got the call that it was a confirmed pregnancy but that the HCG levels were a little low and that I should come back for a follow-up test in a week to make sure it is all progressing in the right way. This was my first experience with all the waiting and worrying that comes with pregnancy. You instantly wonder “what could be wrong?”. Luckily, the results from the follow-up test was perfectly normal and the doctor said that the initial low results could just be due to a miscalculation of date of conception. There will be a few more tests, waiting, and other worries in the future!

According to the doctor, I was about 4 weeks pregnant at the time. It definitely happened a lot faster than we expected (less than a month of trying) but we felt so incredibly blessed and lucky! It really took a few days for the idea to dawn on me: I was going to be a mother! We are going to be a family. In many ways I still felt like a child myself! But I also knew that I was ready for this. We are so excited for this new adventure!

From a young age, I have always known that I wanted a family with multiple children. However, as we all know, we spend most of our young adult life praying not to be pregnant and I still saw babies and kids as weird screaming aliens until very recently. The baby fever switch was quite sudden and I suddenly found myself adoringly staring at random stranger’s babies and wondering how amazing it would feel to have my own. I think meeting the love of my life, Jerry, definitely helped in propelling me into this mode. I was so excited to marry him and to start a family, I can only begin to imagine what an amazing father he would be to our children.

We got married in August after being engaged for a little more than 11 months and dating for less than 2 years. In my wedding vows, I likened our relationship to my favorite quote from “When Harry Met Sally”: When you meet the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible”.  Shortly after we were married, we decided we were ready to start trying for a baby. We started living together early on so did not feel the need to have to try out the “married life” feeling, since we already felt that way!

After doing some research in how to prepare my body for a baby, I also realized that getting pregnant is not easy at all. I follow many amazing bloggers who share candidly their struggle with infertility and was surprised to know that it can happen to anyone, not just people who are above a certain age. I think we assume it is easy because people usually post the good news, but very often we do not see the struggle and effort that has gone on behind the scenes. Because of this, I wanted to give myself a realistic time frame for getting pregnant and to have fun! I did not want this to be a unromantic process where the only goal is to make a baby. Ultimately this is about the love I have for my husband and our plans to start and raise a happy family together. I decided to just go at it naturally and not rely on ovulation tests for now as I felt like it made it a bit too planned and structured (however ovulations tests can be very helpful for people with irregular periods!).

After a amazing month long honeymoon trekking across numerous national parks, I returned to Hong Kong and stopped my birth control. I thought it would be good to give my body some time to get back into its regular cycle. I did do a bunch of research about signs of ovulation, but symptoms also differ between each person. In two weeks, I was traveling to Spain, London, and Amsterdam and according to a regular cycle that would be my time of ovulation. When I was back from my trip, I noticed that I was a lot more emotionally volatile (oh no!) than usual and also quite fatigued for no reason. I would also get hot flashes particularly after eating. I decided to get an early response pregnancy test and patiently waited for the results…

After waiting a few minutes, I was surprised and slightly disappointed to see the signs for “Not pregnant” on the pregnancy test.

 

To be continued…